Carol:
Welcome to the Midlife Career Rebel, the podcast created for high-achieving professional women to gain the clarity, confidence, and courage they need to go after and get the life and career they want. I'm your host, Dr. Carol Parker Walsh, lawyer, social scientist, brand strategist, executive coach, entrepreneur, and midlife career rebel. Each week, you'll learn strategies to manage your mind, navigate the challenges of midlife, and take control of your career so you can thrive doing the work you love. So, if you're ready to tear up that rule book and create your own, you're in the right place, and I can't wait to show you how.
Hey, hey, hey there, rebels. Welcome back to the podcast. And we are still talking with some powerhouse, fabulous, amazing women at Midlife who embody what it means to be a rebel, who are stepping into their own chapters and the highest iterations of their life. And today, I am honored to have a colleague, a friend, a sister-in-arms, Samara Stone. She is the owner and founder of Full Grown, which is a lifestyle brand for grown women who are ready to imagine, create, and boldly live a life of their own design. She has been an entrepreneur since 2005, opening up her private practice in mental health. In fact, that's where she got her start, in the mental health space and background. But right now and today, this woman is on a mission to help middle-aged black women age boldly through community and self-discovery and to have a sense of being an adventurous risk-taker. And I think that is amazing. She wants to help women live boldly, which is what we're all about here. So, with that, Samara, welcome. Thank you for being here.
Samara:
Thank you, Carol. Yes, yes, yes. Hello, hello. It sounded so good when you read that. [inaudible].
Carol:
Isn't it always amazing? I always think it'd be nice to wake up and have someone read a bio of you as you are stepping into the bathroom-
Samara:
[crosstalk].
Carol:
Yes. And getting ready. Just to hear all the amazing things about you and all that.
Samara:
[crosstalk] remind me of who I am, please.
Carol:
Exactly, exactly, exactly. So, Samara, tell me about your journey. I know I've read, and we've talked about starting in mental health. And now, you have totally turned that around and have created this lifestyle brand helping women. I would love to hear about that journey from your start to where you are now.
Samara:
It's so funny. I grew up in Los Angeles. So, this sunshiny disposition, I get it natural. But one of the things that I so remember growing up, most of the women that were colleagues of my mother, they had businesses. Even if it was a little side hustle as micropreneurs or if they were caterers or if they did hair or they... these women were entrepreneurial. So, when I went away to school, I went to Hampton University, HBCU.
Carol:
I worked at Hampton. Did I ever tell you that?
Samara:
Did you?
Carol:
I did.
Samara:
Another thing we have in common, love it. I knew it. I knew it. But when I went there, I ended up being the braider, right? And so, my first business was braiding hair, natural hair stylist at Hampton University. And so, I've always had this entrepreneurial thing about me. I just really like business.
So, when I got to social work school, I was like, first of all, how did I end up in social work, loving business as much as I do? But I love people too. So, it's kind of like that growth process has always been just near and dear to me. And so, when I went through, got my master's in social work and started work places, I, very early in my career, started fusing entrepreneurship with social work. And there wasn't a lot of people that were doing that, but I did it for myself because I wanted to be in business for myself. It was scary getting started. I can't say I did it out of sheer bravery. I had a little push by working at an unethical place while I was pregnant and just had to get up out of there quickly. But in landing on my feet that way and building business and creating momentum, I was able to fuse these two parts of myself: my love for mental health and wellness, and entrepreneurship. And so, I was maybe 30, 31 when I started my first business in 2005. And so, over these 17, 18 years, I've just been growing and developing.
And I guess similar to what probably happens to most women midlife, you hit those 40s, and I think you said it best, you know, one of my favorite sayings, you're climbing this ladder and you got to look and see, "Is it on the right mountain? Where am I headed? What kind of plateau am I on my way to?" And I really did. I think I was about 42 when I started looking around and evaluating different pieces of my life.
And I didn't realize it until I started, one by one, examining them closely like, "Wait a minute. I don't really like the way I structured this damn business. And it's my business. I can't even turn my notice in. Who do I tell I quit? I can't even quit this thing." I'm in this business. I started looking at what was happening in my marriage, looking at my health, looking at my money. I mean, really looking at these areas. And I was like, "This is not what I want for the next 40. So, if we're halfway through? Plot twist. We need to make changes," right? I can't. I can't commit to this for another 40 years and call that life.
And so, I think even though on the outside, I mean, it seemed like I had it all. I've got a big, pretty house. I was married. Three children. I've been a business owner in the community, contracts, employing people with health insurance for heaven's sake. But I knew inside that I was unfulfilled and that I was not living a life that was its most authentic expression and contribution to the world and what I could really do.
And so, I started unraveling. And that's scary because there's no clear end when something unravels. Like, you've seen, if you pull a thread and it just starts and you're like, "Ooh, when does this stop unraveling?"
Carol:
Right.
Samara:
And it wasn't in a bad way. It was like it was unraveling to reveal the light. I was like, "Oh, take all of this shit off." Right?
Carol:
Yeah.
Samara:
And it really started unveiling for me a more authentic way to live. And while it was frightening, this undoing, it involved me making some pivotal changes. And so, once I got to the other side of some of those shifts, and when I tell you I started loving life, I was traveling, I got my little body together, I... listen. It was red lipstick daily. Okay? Red lipstick daily. When I got to that space and people started saying, "Samara, what did you do? Samara, this is... what are you doing?"
And the same way I started my business for coaching mental health entrepreneurs is the same way Full Grown was born, trying to answer that question, "Okay. So, what could I do? What am I doing? And how can I then use this lived experience in a way that contributes to someone else who might be going through the same kind of journey," right?
Carol:
Yeah.
Samara:
So, that might have been a long-winded answer for your question, but that's what it was.
Carol:
Wow. No, I think that's awesome. And you said so many amazing things. Even when I think about how you talked about getting into social work and was like, "How did I get here?" And then you go through your life. And then you're in your 40s and that question again is like, "How did I get here?" And I think that is so... that happens way too often, is that our lives feel like they've become on autopilot, that the choices that we seem to make in our youth don't really feel like ours. It feels like some type of box is checked or some type of script we were handed that we begin to play a part. And that some somehow or other doesn't really happen until midlife that we're like, "Well, wait a minute. When did I sign up for that? And why am I still doing it? And do I still want to do it?"
So, I would love for you to go back and just, if you could remember or tap into just what was it that made you end up in social work or on that journey? What was missing? Or what did you not realize then that you, through your life, realized coming into midlife?
Samara:
I love the way you're talking about this because in Full Grown, I talk about it a lot: trash the template. I say that a lot because it is a template that's handed as young girls on what it means to be good, what it means to be successful, what it means to be [crosstalk]. We've got all these little parameters that we're supposed to operate in, in order to be socially accepted and applauded as doing it right, right?
Carol:
Right. Yes. Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Samara:
Living the good life. It's really packaged up so neatly in marriage, children, and a particular career path, right?
Carol:
Yes.
Samara:
Even if you're choosing some variety of career path, it still means, "Oh no, but you do need to have a clear, respectable career path, ma'am."
Carol:
Yes. That's the key: respectable.
Samara:
Right? Right? And so, I think, for me, I always was really good at sitting with people and rolling in the deep. I have no problem having very vulnerable, open-hearted conversations. Even in middle and high school, I was really good at that. So, when it was time to decide, because you know they're going to say, "Oh, well what's your major?" I chose psychology because I know that me and humans, we get down, right?
Carol:
Got you. Yeah.
Samara:
I got to be with these human [crosstalk]. And I really am so grateful for her. Her name was Maggie [Marella], this Italian woman in Las Vegas, Nevada. I did an internship with her my junior year in undergraduate for the summer. And I was saying to her, "Well, I got to pick something for next steps, you know?" And she's like, "You sure do, honey. And it shouldn't be... " and she went on to tell me all of these things in mental health not to do. She said, "As a matter of fact, social work. It'll give you the most variety. That's what you need to do." And me, loving Maggie, said, "Oh, okay, Maggie. Let's do it." And I tell you, although she was right because I have had such a diverse career in social work because of its flexibility, because of those core tenants, it really did work, the problem was the template of what I thought social work needed to be. That's where I get stuck, right?
Carol:
Yeah, yeah.
Samara:
So, the equipment was fine. It's just the map of where I thought I needed to drive it, right?
Carol:
Yeah, yeah.
Samara:
And I think we do these things because we are trying to be successful or seen as successful and accomplished, but I think, to a large degree, those are internal fulfillment standards. And we don't get that until we're self-aware. Without some self-awareness, you really can't. So, you default to these choices that are kind of like driven paths because they're familiar and you can identify them. And in the absence of self-awareness, how do you know what to choose anyway?
Carol:
Exactly. That's exactly right. And the thing I talk a lot about is about how mindset and particularly fear of the unknown, of getting it right, right? You talk about the respectable career and all that. Can really hold women back from engaging in that self-awareness practice, to begin to pull on that string and start seeing that unraveling. And then all of a sudden, it does become scary. It's like, "Well, wait a minute. Where does it end? And what happens?" And so, I talk a lot about that mindset and that fear factor, really holding people back, holding women back from stepping up. When you were pulling on that string and going through that unraveling, I know you said it was exposing something amazing for you, but were there doubts or fears or questions that came up for you in that process that you were like, "Well, wait a minute"?
Samara:
Oh my God. Over and over and over again. I think I've always been a very positive, sunshiny person. That's just my disposition. But I'll tell you, there were days when I was like, "Am I losing it? Why is it that I'm no longer pleased with what I've had?" And I even had a friend once say, "You're burning the forest. You're just willing to get rid of all of this stuff. You built this life." She was really up in arms about it. And I was like, "Yeah, I am." But I understood that she had a different set of what was valuable to her than what I did.
And so, that was kind of what was the hardest part: the people around me who had a different set of values than what I did and what they wanted for me and did not understand the changes that were being made. That was hard. So, my mom, my ex-husband, my dad, some friends. These folks, they really struggled with it. And in turn, it was a challenge for me.
Carol:
Yeah. I always say people can't see beyond their own limitations.
Samara:
That's what I'm trying to say. How often are we encouraged actively to go out on a limb. Even though that's where the fruit is, how often are we encouraged, you know, "Go do this unknown thing that I'm not certain of"? People, that's-
Carol:
Never.
Samara:
No, no.
Carol:
Yeah.
Samara:
No, no.
Carol:
It's funny. I was having a conversation with my daughter recently, who is... she graduated from college. She's working as a CNA. She's trying to get herself ready because she wants to go to medical school. And in the hospital she's working at, she's telling them what she wants to do, you know, she's getting ready, she's taking some classes right now, and then she's going to get ready for the MCAT. And she's like, "Do you know? So many people are like, 'What? Why are you doing that? You should just be a nurse. What? Why not just be a nurse practitioner?'" Or, "Just why do you want to do... " so many people are limiting her dream of wanting to go further because they can't see it for themselves. And so, they're trying to deter her from seeing it for themselves. So, just what you were saying, yeah, how often do you hear, "Yeah. Go for it. In fact, become the president of the hospital. Run the whole thing." People are often pulling us back, as opposed to pushing us forward.
Samara:
Well, it activates something. When we see someone doing something we've not allowed ourselves to do, right?
Carol:
Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Samara:
And so, that unsolicited advice comes because it's just the tape that's playing in their own minds, "Of course, you can't do that. And if I can't do it, neither can you. None of us can," you know? None of us can do that kind of thinking. And I'll tell you, people, it's scary when they watch you doing something that they thought was impossible because it challenges now this notion of why they're not doing it also. "Why [crosstalk] if she's doing this and I'm watching her win at it, why am I sitting here suffering and allowing something that I don't like to exist in my life? I thought I had to. She's proving me wrong." And so, it's offensive to folks, I think, at times. [crosstalk].
Carol:
Oh yeah.
Samara:
And I've learned-
Carol:
And the uncomfortability of it will make them try to shut you down because you're now making me uncomfortable.
Samara:
Like, "Please stop this. Stop all this flying and soaring and jumping," you know?
Carol:
"Stop all that winning."
Samara:
"Stop it. [inaudible]. Sit it down. Sit it down." But I have compassion for that though because it's a certain type of inadequacy that is built up in ourselves when we are not living our dreams. We have to at least say, "The reason I'm not is because that's not how the game is played, because that's not how it goes, because that's not the rules." But then when you see this rebel breaking the rules and winning, you're just like, "Oh, so, you mean it is possible to do this different," and it challenges their view of the world. And so, I think with great compassion, I was able to...
And I had a lot of support too. This man that entered my life was so wonderful. I just married him too last week, actually.
Carol:
Congratulations.
Samara:
Thank you.
Carol:
I saw those wedding pictures. They're fabulous.
Samara:
But I felt like the support that I had in this relationship was also really useful in that unfolding. And it doesn't have to be that romantic relationship. It can be a friendship or a new... some support is going to come from somewhere when you step out into the journey, right?
Carol:
Yeah, yeah.
Samara:
When you're ready to adjust things in life that no longer fit, there'll be a friend on the journey, if you allow, if you make space for that, whatever that looks like.
Carol:
Yeah, yeah. I love that. We were talking a little bit earlier too about this concept of people accepting the unacceptable. And I think that goes right along with what we're saying, that even though they see you doing something that is uncomfortable for them, or even you yourself want to do something that feels uncomfortable or new for you, the pull, what makes us accept the unacceptable? To stay? To suffer through? And I think women are like the queens of that, of like, "Just let me suffer through and be miserable. And I could hold it and take it while my stress level and my heart palpitations and everything else happens."
Samara:
[crosstalk].
Carol:
Totally, totally. What is it about us that makes us just suffer through and accept the unacceptable, do you think?
Samara:
You remember in science class, they talked about the just-noticeable difference?
Carol:
...
Samara:
[crosstalk] frog will stay in the hot water because they can't really feel that it's heating up until it's too late and their little legs are burned, right? They don't realize, "This is hot." I think life creeps up on us like that incrementally.
Carol:
That's so powerful.
Samara:
My first thought was, "Oh, well, they're afraid." Yeah. Maybe. Maybe that. But when you realize that the water's hot, now you might be scared. But in the beginning, you're wondering, "Well, maybe I'm not doing this right and that's why things are heating up a bit. Maybe somehow... because they seem like they're happy. So, I should be happy. So, maybe I'm... maybe... okay, let me just calibrate here to all the other lemurs that are around me and I'll be all right." And so, groupthink and the template for what we think it's supposed to be, those are very powerful internal cues that let you know you're in the right place. And so, I do think that the social acceptance of status quo is a powerful limiting agent. And I believe that, on some level, when we realize, "I don't really like this," we internalize that as being the fault of our own and not necessarily the circumstances. It takes a minute to identify the problem. Like, the frog must think, "Oh goodness, I'm sweating again. These flashes." No, baby. The water's boiling.
Carol:
Right, right. Exactly, exactly. Yes, yes.
Samara:
[crosstalk] at first, it takes a while to start identifying. And I'll tell you, as I began to realize certain choices that I'd accepted and that I could change them, there was this part of me that felt excited to make the change and then mad as hell that I hadn't made it earlier. Like, are you serious? [crosstalk] around here and let this water boil around my little legs all this time, right?
Carol:
Yes.
Samara:
I do. I think that part of what stops us is that we can't see it. And then once we see it, we've got to be brave enough to do something about it.
Carol:
That is so powerful. I love that because I think you're right. I think it does just creep up on you. And then it becomes, like you said, the choice of, "Do I just stay here and boil? Or do I do something about it?" And then, like you talked about, the mindset of, "But I did this to myself, and so maybe it's too late." I think that's a whole other one there. That's a whole other thing like, "Well, oh well. It's too late for me."
Samara:
[crosstalk] these are the choices I made, so [crosstalk] I have to live with it.
Carol:
For the next 40 years.
Samara:
I had that thought at one point. And I think I told you that when we were talking in the beginning. I remember feeling like, "Well, damn. I don't really like this thing that I've created, but I guess this is my life. I built it. Well, I just better learn to like it, honey," you know?
Carol:
Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Samara:
"Suck it out, buttercup." That was the feeling I had. And I am just so grateful for dissatisfaction and its strength to agitate one into movement because had I been a little more satisfied, I would've stayed in what was less than optimal. But the dissatisfaction kept growing and brewing and brewing. I was like, "I got to do something different."
And it started with the business for me. It started with the weight of responsibility and obligation and meeting those $12,000 payrolls every other week and providing all of this for all of these people and having built a position that I didn't like. And I was like, "I need a break from my own business. And I really do want to resign to someone, but I don't think anyone will read the letter. I don't know who to give it to."
Carol:
And they'll reject it.
Samara:
They would tell me I can't quit. But by making some of those changes, that was the start. That was the start, Carol.
Carol:
Mm-hmm (affirmative). So, when you think about the water warming up, right? So, I think so often, I work with women who are unhappy in their jobs, just what we were talking about, they're not satisfied, they're like, "I know this isn't right for me, or the boss, but I've already done all this education, put all this money, put all this time in it." And I akin that to your analogy of being in the water and it's warming up. What would you say? And this is not a beat up thing because all of us can... hindsight's always 20/20. It's always like, "If I only knew, maybe I would've done something different before." But what would you say to women who are feeling that? Who are on that fence? Who are feeling that pain? Who are feeling that nudge? Who are feeling that level of dissatisfaction, to kind of just say, "Go for it"? What would you say would be the bridge to help them step into that unknown, to pop out of that hot water?
Samara:
I'll tell you, for me, a lot of self-discovery and exploring was key for me because I think, as you get to know yourself better, you start to see, "Well, I don't stand a chance in hell at being happy with this. This isn't in alignment with who I am." You know what I mean? And so, whatever spiritual system you have, when you start seeking guidance and looking for, "Okay, am I on purpose? Am I doing the thing that I've come here to do?" it's really that metaphysical level of living, can help you to examine yourself from an outsider's view and say, "Well, maybe these choices don't feel good because they're just not right for me." That was helpful for me.
And I think the other part is to surround yourself with examples of women that are being bold, being brave, and making strange choices, you know?
Carol:
Yeah, yeah.
Samara:
Surround yourself with people who are willing to do something different. And see the results they create for themselves. It'll whet your appetite for what's possible for yourself. Watch people move because people are doing this.
I was talking to somebody about the midlife piece, like, what happens at midlife. And I think they call it a crisis for a reason because shit has to change. There's got to be some things that get different on the other side of this because you're fully mature, you're full grown now, and it's like, "Okay, wait a minute. Now, I'm not making life decisions based on templates or social conditioning. I'm making this based on the skin I'm in." And so, we start being brave enough to make changes.
So, you'll find examples of people out there. Look for them. They're out there redesigning their lives. You can feel it when you see somebody who's in that process because they're tingling with excitement. There's a youthfulness about them. There's a renegade, there's a rebelliousness about them. They cuss more. They wear bold colors. You'll find them. They're out there. Let them be lampposts for you about what's possible. The people who are retiring and doing odd things for a living. They're out there. They're out there.
Carol:
Yeah. I love that. Yeah. And go look for it because there's something... like, why are we stubborn? Or think sometimes that this work is not the work? I think we tend to, particularly high-achieving, powerful players, like, women who are making it happen, we tend to be so action-oriented that we're looking for the thing to do, the next move, the next turn, the next project, the next opportunity. But all of that is what comes after the reflection, the self-awareness.
Samara:
The thing to be.
Carol:
Right, right. Why do we skip that step? Why do we want to skip that?
Samara:
Well, that's the hard part. That's the hard part. That's the hard... go all the way back to the way we were academically acclimated to accomplishment. You sit down. You do your work. You write your name neat on the paper. You get an A-plus. You get stickers. You get a pin, saying you're a good citizen. We are acclimated in terms of what we do. We're not always as acclimated to what we be. I know that's not appropriate grammar, but you understand.
Carol:
Oh, totally. Yes, yes.
Samara:
And so, I think that sometimes we resist it because it's so unfamiliar. I don't have a way to gauge success with being. You're asking me how... I don't know how I feel in absence of what I'm producing. I feel good when I produce. If I'm not producing, I don't know how I feel. There's a disconnection.
[Crosstalk] as a mental health professional, that's kind of been useful for me is that awareness of your emotional state or awareness of observing one's thoughts, being able to be present with yourself. That's a big game-changer in allowing you to do something different, right?
Carol:
Yeah.
Samara:
Because if you don't have self-awareness, if don't have an observer that kind of allows you to see, look at yourself in that way, you won't know. You're looking for outputs. And this is not about outputs. This stage of life is not about the checkmark-chasing. It's just not. It really is more so about being fully embodied and really living authentically and enjoying life because honestly, Carol, none of us get out of here alive.
Carol:
That's true.
Samara:
We don't know how long we've got, but those last few hours at the amusement park, don't you want to play? You want to get on the rides. That's kind of the space that we're in at midlife. It's like, no, I don't value this other thing around what I'm doing and impressing people and stuff. I value what I'm being, what I'm experiencing, and the connections that I have with humans.
Carol:
Yes. That's gold. That's so good. That's so good. And I think what you talked about before, I really think it is important. It's not something I think I even realized early on because you are a strong woman, you do things on your own, you figure it out. That's the kind of mantra that we've been fed, the lie, the fallacy that we have been fed and bought into. And my mind is designed to keep us from getting the support and connection that we need because if we're isolated, it's like the animal kingdom, it's easier to take you out when you're isolated and by yourself, as opposed to collectively coming together for support. But I think, to your point, I think it really is... like, coaching and tapping into somebody or something and having a community, I think is just so life-changing. I mean, is that a part of your own journey? Has that been a thing that's helped you along this unraveling and unveiling process that you went through?
Samara:
I mean, tremendously. And for me personally, a lot of it did have to do with exploring spirituality too, going beyond the Christianity that I was given as a child and start to looking at things like human design and astrology. I started like getting to know more about myself. "Tell me my birth chart. Let me go look at this." [inaudible]. Oh man, I started having fun with this stuff. But in doing so, I started to see myself a little bit differently, not just as someone that could do things, but as someone who was meant to be something for someone and for myself, right?
Carol:
Yeah.
Samara:
It changed a lot for me. It did.
And it was difficult for a while too because I did grow up Christian so that wasn't something that I talked to people about readily because I remember them saying, "Oh, yoga is the devil," you know? [inaudible] we in trouble now. I can't even stretch, you know? But having to even push beyond some of those things and say, "No, I'm going to go find my own. I'm going to explore on my own and see what calms me, what gives me a sense of groundedness and purpose, what's helpful."
And I think, to your point, about community, finding other people who are on a similar journey, oh, the validation in that. Oh, it's just sweet, sweet, sweet. It's nothing better. It's kind of like going to the cookout. You know what I mean? It's the best experience when you meet other women who are on a similar journey. And together, that rising tide is lifting all the boats [crosstalk] harbor. That experience is beautiful. And so, women can do that for one another.
Years ago, I remember reading a book called The Red Tent. And it talks about how women, when they were on their cycles or when it was time to birth babies, they'd all go out to this red tent. And that was a place where women only went and spent time together. And I was like, man, that's just the coolest thing. We have a way of circling around one another for nurturing and support when we allow ourselves to do so. When we stop the doing and just open our heart and kind of allow ourselves to be in connection with each other, that's possible. That's possible.
We do need guidance. I mean, that's kind of why I created Full Grown because people are asking, "How do you do it?" And I do think having a guide for, "Well, here's what to expect from the 40s. Here's what self-discovery looks like. This is what it looks like to make choices that are in alignment with what you've discovered about yourself." That type of guidance, it's priceless.
Carol:
That's why I'm so proud of the Career Rebel Academy because the very first process that we go through is this discovery process. And I actually use the words unraveling and unveiling and discovering and reconnecting because you have to, in so many ways, you know, when you think about gardening, for example, before you plant something, you got to dig up that ground and loosen up the soil and pull out those weeds and get it prepared in order to plant something of substance and then to grow into what's next. And that process, that archeological inventory that we do for ourselves, that understanding and reconnecting, I think is so powerful. And, for me, because your career is just a component, a part of the greater ecosystem of your life, you have to figure out the life to see where the career fits into it. And so, it is so powerful to do that work and to have the support and to have the guide and to be able to have people, particularly when you have the naysayers around you who may try to pull you away, and it's very easy to get pulled away because so much of society is not doing this work or talking about this work or supporting that type of work.
Samara:
Oh, that's so true. I'm so grateful that you do this for women in their career spaces because you're right. We spend how much of our life? Hours?
Carol:
90,000.
Samara:
You know what I mean? To be doing something that feels like turning widgets, that's not a good use of all of the resources that is-
Carol:
That we were blessed with and given. We are here for a reason and purpose. Totally. Absolutely.
Samara:
And some of us are fortunate enough that we choose career paths that are in alignment with our purpose. That's great. That's good. But even in that, you can still get stuck in the doing and not having enough meaning and enough fulfillment in life. I know that's what happened with me. I love helping people, social work, and all that. Yeah. But becoming an administrator was the wrong move, right?
Carol:
Right, right.
Samara:
[crosstalk] just tweaking things a bit can make a-
Carol:
And leveraging that. I love how you... it's not like you threw out the baby with the bath water. You pulled the pieces of it that were aligned so that you can take it in the direction that it needed to go.
Samara:
At each pivot. And I mean, I've made several pivots in my 17 years of business. The first one was just starting to help other people build mental health businesses the way that I had because they kept asking. So, I was like, "Okay, let me build a program that teaches you how to become a mental health entrepreneur."
And I noticed as we were doing that program, people really got stuck when it came to branding and nicheing and marketing. So, I created a program that helped people to do that. And along the way, I'm making money doing all of those things. So, I was kind of iterating alongside the business. It had enough flexibility that I could start to grow in it.
But the mistake that I made is not letting go of things that no longer served me. I would just add a new thing on. So, now, here I am with 3, 4 businesses. Oh my God, Samara. Who has four businesses? Not knowing it's time to release some of these things that no longer serve. And in doing so, you create a clear space for more. I didn't really know that part. So, [crosstalk] that part, I've released some things and then made space for... coming out of mental health as a coach and mentor just for entrepreneurs and moving more into, like you said, leveraging all of that for grown women that are ready to keep growing.
Carol:
Yeah. Well, let's talk about Full Grown. I want to hear all about this amazing venture. If nothing else, you have got to check out Full Grown, and the links will be in the show notes, because the look and feel of it just feels like, "Come on in into a whole other dimension." I mean, I love the colors and the looks. And you look amazing with all of it. It's so inviting and wonderful. So, tell me about Full Grown and how it works and what it's for and who it impacts and all the things. Tell me all the things.
Samara:
I love talking about it. It's like my baby. I'm just sitting here, smiling like, "Oh, Full Grown. She is so cute." [crosstalk].
Carol:
She is cute.
Samara:
That's how I feel. I feel like the way to sum up what this is. Anywhere where black women over 40, or even 40ish because I've had several women, like 35, like, "Please, you know I belong in that community." Yes, you do belong in that community. 40ish. Wherever they're growing, healing, or having fun, that's where Full Grown enters. We are about being a community that supports that rising tide we were talking about a moment ago, that community of women that are supporting one another in their growth. And so, I have a system that I created that, just like what you're doing with careers, I'm doing that with life. Helping women become more self-aware and then make intentional choices from that space of self-awareness.
And then we've got a whole lot of piece around what is medicine? What is healing? Medicine is anything that helps. And because I've been a mental health professional for so many years and I've actually helped so many mental health professionals build their business, I've got a roster of folks with all kinds of expertise that can support you in kind of dealing with that past stuff. In 40-something years, you've experienced quite a bit of things in life. And if you allow a painful past to kind of stand in the way of the present or you're constantly allowing that painful past to frame a fearful future, you don't really have a chance to build roots in the now that can help you to build the life that you want to build. So, we clear some of that stuff.
And then we have fun. We have a retreat that we're going to do each year, where we actually, as a community, go to a destination. We have merch, cool shirts [crosstalk].
Carol:
Fabulous merch.
Samara:
Yes, yes. Well, because it is a beautiful brand. And it is fun. And it has good energy. And I think even our small group programs... and I do some private coaching with it too, but I most enjoy the small group because that's where the community is built. And so, it is. It's coaching programs. It's live events. It's retreats. And most of all, it is a space for women to grow.
Carol:
That is so amazing. Do people come in in cohorts? Or how can people become a part of it?
Samara:
We just launched it in December. It's been amazing. These last three months of watching this thing come to life has been amazing. So, the first cohort for the actual curriculum is moving through now. And I feel like when we did our Choose More Summit, which you were beautiful and gracious to be a part of.
Carol:
Oh, it was a pleasure to be a part of.
Samara:
What it did is it framed for women the different areas that we were going to touch on because we talk about sexuality, spirituality, money mindset, career, health, caregiving. I mean, we go everywhere in the program. And so, I wanted to make sure that we flushed through that one in a solid way. And so, the next cohort will open in the fall.
Carol:
Awesome, awesome. Well, I'll definitely make sure we have links in there. So, Samara, my last question for you is, what does being a career rebel mean to you?
Samara:
Just like when I told you about being a social worker that's an entrepreneur that loves business, these two things don't go together, being a career rebel is a willingness to do it your way. You can take whatever training, whatever skill sets you have, and build your own path, one that allows you to be fulfilled and kind of make some money. We can make money and make a difference. And I think being a career rebel is finding that sweet spot. Where your Saturday self and your Monday morning meet, that's the stuff of a career rebel.
Carol:
Yes. Oh, I love that. Listen, you know we could talk-
Samara:
Yeah.
Carol:
Stay on here for a minute, but this has been absolutely amazing. And there's so much more I know we could talk about. Maybe we have to do it again and have a part two and pick it up later on. But I just want to thank you so much for taking the time and for being here and sharing your wisdom, being authentic and vulnerable and open and just gems that were shared. And so, I just want to thank you for your time and being here.
Samara:
Well, Carol, thank you. Thank you for having me. Thank you for being a trailblazer for us women at midlife that know there's more that we can contribute beyond what our careers have been and are looking for the light. Thank you for being that lamppost. I really, really appreciate you and your work.
Carol:
Thank you so much. Thank you. Well, listen, that's it, rebels. This was amazing. This is one you're going to want to listen to again and again and again. So, thank you so much for being here. Please make sure that you like, subscribe, leave a comment, share this with other people. I know you have friends and colleagues out there who would love to listen to this episode and get so much out of it. And listen, until next time, have a rebellious week. See you soon.
Hey, if you're loving what you're learning on the podcast, then you've got to come check out the Career Rebel Academy. It's where you'll get the individual help and support you need applying the concepts and strategies you're learning here, and so much more. You'll be joined by a community of other rebels just like you. And I'll be there as your guide every step of the way. If you're genuinely looking to change the course of your life and career, I promise you, this is the place you'll want to be. Just go to www.carolparkerwalsh.com/career-rebel-academy. I can't wait to see you there.
